Tuesday, December 13, 2005

Why I Call Him "David the Likable"

I've often wondered whether David Brooks happened across a rerun of the Get Smart episode with Jack Gilford one night early in his career when he was looking for a way to stand out from the pack of conservative commentators. After all, he could never hope to match the ability of a John Fund or a David Horowitz to get away with telling blatant lies. As for as lying shamelessly while engaging in moral posturing, who could hope to equal Bill the Pharisee in that department? Of course, O'Reilly and Limbaugh had the shouting windbag angle covered and the attractive blonde conservative thing was out of the question. I can just imagine the light bulb going off in his head when he saw that Simon the Likable epsode. After all, I'm sure David always was a pleasant enough sort. Who better to seem amiable and open-minded while engaging in blatant distortion?

I mention this half-baked theory of mine because of Brooks' appearance on Sunday's Meet the Press. The man is such a master that he even sounded pleasant when he said:

Look, I don't want to absolve Bush; Bush should be leading more. But let's get to the core issue here which is that when we looked after Katrina, we thought we've got a blank slate here, the city's been wiped out. Let's do some real experimentation. And the core problem is in New Orleans right now, where a lot of us from outside, frankly, thought, let's experiment. But people in New Orleans want their city back. They want the city they had. And so it's made it very difficult to talk about innovation.

When he said that utter nonsense, I wondered if he sounded reasonable to people in other places. Of course, it's utter nonsense to suggest that the people of New Orleans would have already received more aid if they had allowed more experimentation and innovation, but he sounded so nice that I had to wonder if people in other places were buying it.

Still, I can't help wondering how pleasant Mr. Brooks would sound repeating that nonsense to a group of New Orleanians. So I've decided to invite Mr. Brooks to come down and explain to some of my neighbors that they just need to let Mr. Brooks' friends experiment and more money will be forthcoming.

So, how about it David? Just email me, I'll be happy to show you around. It might not even be all that unpleasant; in my immediate neighborhood the damage ranged from the bad to the not so bad. However, if we take a short walk to the other side of The Fairgrounds people might not be so nice. That's getting into Gentilly where the damage ranged from bad to devasting. I can introduce you around there as well; I worked near Dillard university for four years prior to Katrina. I frequently walked to work and nodded or said hello to the people I passed, so I'm at least familar to quite a few people in the area. Unfortunately, they're not all back for me to introduce you to, but I'll be happy to take you around. Otherwise, I'll contact the Gentilly Neighborhood Association or Gentilly Heights Neighborhood Association and try to arrange a meeting. So email me and come down to explain to these people why they should have just let you experiment. Otherwise, please SHUT THE FUCK UP on national TV.

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